The two sides in your life (if there is)

[kryptonite123]

Okay, I think this place is more appropriate to ask what I want to ask than in the 'Sex Discussion' section.


I'm just entered the chionging FL scene, and up to this point of time, I've bonked two FLs - one Thai and one PRC. Right now, I'm having emotional issues to grapple, which I would like some experienced and rational bros to advise me on.


A little info abt myself:

- 10 yrs in all-boys sch, never had a girlfriend and just ORDed 10 months ago.

- The Thai FL was my first time having sex. It happened in March earlier this year. Prior to that session I remembered, I thought sex would be so damn fantastic, but it turned out otherwise. I felt quite horrible for losing my first time that way.

- Second time happened just recently. Guess small head overruled big head after seeing the pics in FL Dome 2. The sex was much better, but after the session, it got me thinking. Again.

- After both sessions, I kind of understand why people say men can distinguish between sex and love.


Here's my problem/dilemma:

I think I fucked up my life like that. I am currently in my 1st year at one of the 3 local universities, so you can say I have some future in life. I'm sure I will meet a decent local girl in time to come, whom I will have genuine feelings for. When that happens, I believe I'll feel damn horrible (guilty) inside, since I have this big and dirty secret to keep from her.

I know it's no use crying over spilt milk now, and I'm going to get zapped, but would like to hear from bros who have similar experiences to me. Bros who chiong FLs, be it whether you are single, have a steady girlfriend, or have families with kids, do you have ever have such emotional issues you have to grapple with?

I'm thinking of quitting commercial sex. But then again, as time passes, as small head overrule big head, I may be back at this again. *Sighs*

Damn, why did God give us a penis and brain, but not enough blood to flow to both places at the same time?

[HCKing]

u will be surprised hw many girls are no longer virgins at yr age, be it losing them to their ex or ONS etc. to me sex itself is just an act, most importantly is whether do u enjoy the act or not. u can have a great decent gf but if the sex sucks u will still be on the lookout for alternatives either consciously or subconsciously. which is y for guys love is love ( emotional attachment ) while sex is sex ( lust attachment )

[Chinapuss]

Everyone has the 'ying' and everyone also has the 'yang', juz balance both sides and u'll hav a harmony mind and soul

[leecs]

Originally Posted by kryptonite123

I think I fucked up my life like that. I am currently in my 1st year at one of the 3 local universities, so you can say I have some future in life. I'm sure I will meet a decent local girl in time to come, whom I will have genuine feelings for. When that happens, I believe I'll feel damn horrible (guilty) inside, since I have this big and dirty secret to keep from her.

Dont think this way, bro. I believe your future GF will feel more guilty & have a bigger & dirtier secret than you.

As what HCKing said, many girls are already not virgins at your age. They might even have more partners than you going for FL...

[Big Sexy]

mate... when i was in my 1st year at one of the top uni in the UK..
i was screwing babes almost every night.. enjoy your life in the uni..
there will be load of screwing experience in the uni to tell to your kids in future.

Originally Posted by kryptonite123

I am currently in my 1st year at one of the 3 local universities, so you can say I have some future in life.

[leecs]

Originally Posted by Big Sexy

mate... when i was in my 1st year at one of the top uni in the UK..
i was screwing babes almost every night.. enjoy your life in the uni..
there will be load of screwing experience in the uni to tell to your kids in future.

I didnt even go uni & i was screwing babes almost every weekend.

[nabei]

everyone has a past.
u will be surprised that nowadays girls are as naughty and daring as you or even more.
i mean it is always an internal struggle.
from the day you start to pcc and then progress to going commercial.
i can understand that you will feel guilty and think that you are very dirty.
it will always be an internal struggle.
no one is a saint and can hold high moral compass as you are made that way - to pro-create.
there are always 2 sides of the coin.
you do not need to feel guilty and hate yourself as this will not solve anything as whats done is done.
Come to think of it, you paid as a business transaction and you do not molest, rape or trick other unwilling victims using unscrupulous means, just that morally you think its incorrect.

I guess everyone has its urges and its good to release it but do not overdo it. lets say u go get addicted and genah KCed and then broke up your own family or burdened your parents, then its bad.
so thats where the self control comes in which you have to slowly train.

why not try to control yourself:
1. exercise regularly to reduce your urges - go for your regular runs
2. get a good and nice girl to settle down
3. focus on your studies for a better future
4. spend more quality time with your family
5. think that 150 bucks per bonk is your pocket $ for say 1/2 to 1 month!

remember everyone has their past, its what we make out our future that counts

[kryptonite123]

Originally Posted by Chinapuss

Everyone has the 'ying' and everyone also has the 'yang', juz balance both sides and u'll hav a harmony mind and soul

Bro, too chiem liao. Care to elaborate?

Dont think this way, bro. I believe your future GF will feel more guilty & have a bigger & dirtier secret than you.

Bro, I do not have a religion, but I believe in karma and retribution. After all, what goes around will eventually come back around. Now I chiong FL, scarli next time my girlfriend tell me she got do or is doing FL. If that happens, I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

mate... when i was in my 1st year at one of the top uni in the UK..
i was screwing babes almost every night.. enjoy your life in the uni..
there will be load of screwing experience in the uni to tell to your kids in future.

Bro, I take it that you were screwing the girls in campus (or?). Perhaps if my sexual encounters were flings from clubs and night clubs, I wouldn't feel so crappy right now. Imagine this scenario:

I meet this girl which I truly like, not just feelings of lust for her. She asks me abt my history.

Answer A: "I had ONS with a few girls I picked up from ABC club."
Answer B: "I hired sex on a couple of occasions."

I guess answer A is better (much better) than answer B. Isn't it?

everyone has a past.
u will be surprised that nowadays girls are as naughty and daring as you or even more.
i mean it is always an internal struggle.
from the day you start to pcc and then progress to going commercial.
i can understand that you will feel guilty and think that you are very dirty.
it will always be an internal struggle.
no one is a saint and can hold high moral compass as you are made that way - to pro-create.
there are always 2 sides of the coin.
you do not need to feel guilty and hate yourself as this will not solve anything as whats done is done.
Come to think of it, you paid as a business transaction and you do not molest, rape or trick other unwilling victims using unscrupulous means, just that morally you think its incorrect.

I guess everyone has its urges and its good to release it but do not overdo it. lets say u go get addicted and genah KCed and then broke up your own family or burdened your parents, then its bad.
so thats where the self control comes in which you have to slowly train.

why not try to control yourself:
1. exercise regularly to reduce your urges - go for your regular runs
2. get a good and nice girl to settle down
3. focus on your studies for a better future
4. spend more quality time with your family
5. think that 150 bucks per bonk is your pocket $ for say 1/2 to 1 month!

remember everyone has their past, its what we make out our future that counts

Bro, you're spot on - it's always an internal struggle. Personally, I'm still torn between the issue of commercial sex and non-commercial sex (picking up girls from clubs and having ONS). After all, these two groups of guys are ultimately looking for that one thing - sex. It's just that the latter group doesn't want to play the chasing game, and so decides to pay instead. On the other hand, the other group will play the game of seduction. Does this make the latter group morally superior to the former group? Well, I don't know.

As for people defaulting payment on commercial sex workers, I really despise such creatures from the bottom from my heart. After all, prostitutes also need to make a living, and they exchange a service for money, at the expense of their bodies. They do not steal, rob, or cheat. I have more respect for them than those people high up on the social and economic ladder, who put up a front of righteousness, and yet do plenty of shit behind our backs. Just look at the recent Wall Street scandal; that Madoff fellow - classic example.

Yes, I know life still has to go on, and the sun will still rise from the east tmr morning. I do have concrete hobbies and interests to keep me occupied, but you know, as a hot-blooded male, seriously need to unload at times also. Last time, can watch porn and pcc, now like no effect liao. Then when you see the pics and steamy FRs in FL Dome section, small head overrule big head already.

I think I need a girlfriend, but that's my dilemma now. When I really get one, the problems which I had mentioned above will surface. I do not expect my girlfriend to be a virgin (I had this mentality long before my first bonk). But if I really to get a virgin girl who is pretty, sweet, great, etc., I think that's when my nightmare will begin.

[demondemon]

its pretty normal, some of the seniors here i believe are married etc for them its just a way to destress and relax, at the end of the day as long as they take care of their family etc i feel its ok.

You don't really have to think so much about, its just sex, many people lose it at a young age nowadays, why feel so much guilt?

[flowerpot]

Sorry Dude...

I don't give a damn...

The only pity is losing virginity to hired sex.....

otherwise, sex is like breakfast, lunch, dinner to me...

whether i took more meals or skip some meals, it does'nt affect my LIFE...

SO!!! Do what u want, man need to be satisfied physically + mentally.....

Nothing wrong...

[hoho99]

Well Ts seems to me that you might not have met anyone who is also in the cheonging scene as you are.

When i was young, there was once i was stuck in a shopping mall with a long queue at the taxi stand. Luckily for me a taxi uncle ask if anyone is going to the east and i simply shout across " Uncle, MG ktv ok bo?" That uncle then gave me his brightest smile and we on our way over. Along the way that uncle gave me a word of wisdom which i would love to share with you, he said its not a sin for guys to cheong, in fact more married man needed it to release (Stress, anger, cum, you name it). It helps men from bringing their unhappiness back home. (Well unless you allow you self to be kc'ed of course) Tat nite i fast leg fast hand quickly bonk the lady that always sit with me

As for gf, i believe you should always come clean on your past before you start the relationship. At least she goes in with her eyes open and she will understand or even satisfy your sexual needs At the most cannot do raw wif her lor

Ts enjoy your life, you only live once. Sorry for being kay po hor

[newyorker88]

Originally Posted by Big Sexy

mate... when i was in my 1st year at one of the top uni in the UK..
i was screwing babes almost every night.. enjoy your life in the uni..
there will be load of screwing experience in the uni to tell to your kids in future.

In college days, we use to have drinking sessions every weekend. Naturally, sex comes with it.

[Cheonging101]

Originally Posted by leecs

I didnt even go uni & i was screwing babes almost every weekend.

I also neber go uni & I was screwed by babes every day at one point of my life.

[Hurricane88]

Originally Posted by kryptonite123

I know it's no use crying over spilt milk now, and I'm going to get zapped, but would like to hear from bros who have similar experiences to me. Bros who chiong FLs, be it whether you are single, have a steady girlfriend, or have families with kids, do you have ever have such emotional issues you have to grapple with?

I'm thinking of quitting commercial sex. But then again, as time passes, as small head overrule big head, I may be back at this again. *Sighs*

Damn, why did God give us a penis and brain, but not enough blood to flow to both places at the same time?

Oi...you are just human not machine...dun think so much...just follow your heart and go with it...enjoy yourself and dun indulge in this...best quit FL chionging and find a decent gf...plenty of gals in uni and dun have to waste money...anyway money is from your parents or sponsor since you haven't start working...

[virginboy]

Bro, don't waste your money on FLs. There are lots of babes in the uni waiting to be screwed. The more chio the girl is, the easier it is to get her on the bed. Don't be shy to approach them. The reason why they are dressed to kill is to wait a guy like you. When I was in NTU during the nineties, it was a great sexperiene.