I lurched up and staggered a bit as I headed for the bathroom.
"Where are you going?" asked Heidi.
"Arrrgh," I answered. I couldn't get their images out of my mind. I realized that boner had actually developed in my pants and felt the embarrassment flood through me. It was entirely different than it had felt in my quick fantasy. It was actually much worse.
"I'll explain it to you later, Dear," I heard Hannah say.
"Explain what?"
"Later," barked Hannah.
That was when I knew, deep in my bones, that Hannah was a secret sorceress or something, and really could see the images in my mind of herself as a naked succubus whose goal was to consume me, body and soul.
I calmed down in the bathroom. I splashed enough water in my face to get the front of my shirt wet, but it helped me get control back. I was a little amazed. I'd looked at both women before, of course, evaluating their sexuality. Like Hannah had said, I am a man. But it had always been just a momentary kind of a nice diversion. I mean I appreciated them both on a number of levels. Heidi was a younger version of her mother, but not as ripe. Hannah was a sensual woman, though I don't think she tried to be. It was just natural. It had developed in the first year of their marriage and when I noticed it, I decided it was because she became accustomed to being worshiped as a goddess by Desmond. He was insanely happy because she'd married him and he didn't mind showing it. I'd often thought she could make some other guy insanely happy as well, but she'd said on more than one occasion that she wasn't looking for a man.
Heidi, on the other hand, was young and fresh and sexy in that way of a promise of joy, like a beautiful present that is forbidden to be unwrapped until later. I was pretty sure she was already making boys by the dozens jerk their meat raw, but I had never imagined actually being around her naked. Her, I mean. Or me, either for that matter.
I decided that what had happened to me was like bursting into tears when the stress gets too high. It had just been a catharsis of sorts. It didn't mean I was an animal, or pervert, or horny out of my mind. My own sex life was primarily solitary, but that was fine with me. My hand never has a headache, and I have a whole raft of fantasies I can call on when the need arises.
I stood up and straightened my shoulders. I frowned at the wet front of my shirt, but there wasn't anything I could do about it at the moment. I took several deep breaths and then remembered my unruly little friend. I looked at the front of my pants in the mirror and was delighted that my bone wasn't a bone anymore. I targeted my thoughts on that part of my body and felt nothing.
I didn't even mind that it might very nearly be only two inches long, at the moment.
When I got back to the table nobody said anything to me. I saw Hannah's eyes drift to my shirt, but then they moved to her plate. I later found out she'd told Heidi I was embarrassed about the posing naked thing and not to mention it again until later.
The rest of supper went fine. My brain, which was obviously perverted after all, kept trying to go back to pornographic images of my dinner companions, but I was able to think of something else.
Afterwards I said I needed to get home.
"You can't leave," complained Heidi, who had interpreted "later" as "right after supper."
"Yes he can," said Hannah.
"Mom!"
"Heidi, you can talk to him later!"
"It is later," argued Heidi.
"You have plenty of time, young lady!"
"Oh, bollocks!" said Heidi, dramatically.
"What?" We both stared at her.
"I heard it on a British documentary. Does it sound cool?"
"It doesn't sound very ladylike," said her mother.
"I'm a girl, not a lady," said Heidi. "Ladies are old."
"I beg your pardon!" said Hannah.
"I'll leave you two to it," I said, managing meaningful words for the first time since being asked to pose nude in front of a sixteen-year-old artist.
"I'll call you," said Hannah. That sounded odd. She called me all the time, but never warned me she was going to do it.
"Sure," I said.
I left the house and walked down the sidewalk toward my car.
I felt like I'd just managed to avoid the jaws of an alligator.
Or something.... ........